How does he do it?

It's no secret around here: I am a wee bit dramatic, and prone to perhaps the occasional exaggeration. My husband, he often either bears the brunt of this or is slightly entertained. Take, for instance, a little snippet of the conversation that we just had after coming home from the gym a couple of evenings ago. I was craving chips insanely and the only ones we had were stale--chips I had bought and opened well over a month ago to go with my trans-fat filled "queso cheese dip-" something I likely procured from the local convenience store. My husband has this one little annoying quality--but just this one--of not drying his hands after he washes them. Instead he gives them a cursory pat on the closest object, often of a fabric nature but not always.

So in this instance he brushes his hands against a towel hanging from the oven door and sticks it into the chips. WET.

"OH MY GOD-AAAA!"

His eyes get really wide like he's racking his brain to figure out what he did in the past hour, day, or maybe year of his life to produce this fit of despair.

"AHHH...YOU...WET HANDS...CHIPS....NOOOOOO!!!" was all I get out of my mouth.

And then, I went on. Yes, I did: "I can't believe you. I cannot believe I have to live with someone like you! That is soooo disgusting."

He was all "Dude, let me get my wet hand out of this bag so that you can enjoy your STALE chips."

And I was like, "UUGHH....Thanks."

Occasionally he has a sense of humor.